Survivor Philippines, episode 13, air date Dec. 12, 2012
upon returning from tribal council, abi finally shows some graciousness and thanks the group for not sending her home. and malcolm pets her on the head like a dog. what abi doesn't get is that carter was only voted out because he was a threat at challenges. thankfully malcolm is always thinking and is reading into lisa's comments at tribal about taking someone to the final who she can beat - that would not be malcolm! and probably not denise. hopefully the two of them can work out a plan that ensures they will make it to the end. i don't care who the final three are as long as malcolm and denise are there.
abi tries to plant seeds of doubt with lisa that she is the low man in their 4-way alliance. lisa doesn't believe a word she says but she's playing abi well, keeping her close in case she needs her. lisa is still talking about when to make her "big move." i'm not sure if she knows but there's only a few days left!
#rewardchallenge - race up and down a slide into the ocean and grab two bundles of rings. throw and hook the rings on 5 pegs to win reward. winner gets to take two buddies along with him. this slide is kicking lisa's ass as she comes tumbling down, end over side over butt. skupin and malcolm lead this challenge early on. it's neck and neck between these two but skupin takes the win. after his win, abi demands a hug. maybe she's hoping some hoochie hoochie get her a spot on the reward chopper. skupin picks malcolm and denise to join him and gives his share of tribe food to denise and offers to do her dishes. "poor" abi got nothing and seems heartbroken. hey remember a few episodes ago when you hated skupin so much you wanted him gone and tried to kill him with a coconut? you reap what you sow!
back at camp abi says she's "crushed" and "really heartbroken" that she wasn't chosen to go on reward. what made her think that any one of the other four players would pick her to go??? she already knows (and has reminded us several times) that she is unlikable. then she disses denise, calling her terrible and wonders why no one likes her. meanwhile, denise is just tolerating her, listening to her babble about being the swing vote (??? is she delusional or just saying it in hopes of convincing people?) and her hidden immunity idol, blah blah blah. shut. up.
PLEASE let denise win immunity...or malcolm win so he can give one to denise. please.
what they played for: helicopter ride to a boat ride with pizza, soda and shark watching (and chocolate chip cookies!). skupin calls soda "pop". i often wonder if the majority of the U.S. says "soda" or "pop"? my friend from chicago laughed at me when i said "soda." she said "you sound so old fashioned!" really? I sound old fashioned??
anyway...
apparently skupin doesn't normally consume sugar but now he's had 4 sodas and is acting like a drunk chick at a bar (malcolm's words, not mine) and daring lisa to eat pizza off a flipper. then they go swimming with a HUGE whale shark and since the sea creatures are also aware of skupin's affinity for injury, the shark gives him a little bump for good measure. strategy talk starts and malcolm says he wants to cut denise out - what?! say it ain't so! come on, they've had a tight alliance since the beginning, they even hugged on it.
is denise having a heart attack? eek, it looks like she got bit by something really nasty, looking at the fang marks on her neck (edward?). dammit, i hope this doesn't force her out of the game, leaving abi in the final four. but instead of consulting medical, why don't we just pray on it?
#immunitychallenge - walk across a rope bridge by moving wood planks, grab maze pieces along the way, put the maze puzzle together and get a ball through the maze. everyone is neck in neck until malcolm falls off and has to go back to the beginning of the rope bridge and start all over again and it takes him FOREVER to catch up with everyone else at the puzzle phase. denise is the only one who is close to completing the maze but is still a few pieces off - go denise! then out of nowhere, malcolm destroys the puzzle and has the ball through before anyone even knows what hit them. malcolm now has double immunity, what will he do with it? could he possibly sniff out lisa's plan to keep abi and give immunity to denise?
as soon as they get back, skupin tries to throw himself in the fire again. oh, and abi starts scrambling to make a deal with lisa & skupin to take her to the end because they would have a better chance to win.
tribal council:
- as usual, everything is laid out on the table during tribal. there are no secrets here, not with abi-maria around!
- abi comes out and tells everyone that they should vote out denise because she's impossible to beat. malcolm is listening intently to all this. PLEASE give denise your HII!
- oh wait, abi's not done. she tells skupin point blank that he will not win a million dollars, he's an idiot and a moron (twice). that's a sure way to secure any deal you may have made with him. duh.
- and after abusing skupin abi calls denise a terrible person. denise, who seems like the most level-headed and even-keeled person in this game. how can she not hear herself? she's so loud!
- penner gives everyone the finger but i'm guessing it's directed towards lisa and skupin.
- 1 vote denise, 4 votes abi. so long bitchy lady! god i'm so happy i don't have to hear her mouth again until the final tribal.
and with that, poisonous abi is finally, FINALLY gone...as skupin skips and dances away from tribal council. previews show denise plotting against malcolm so i guess everyone is in this game to win. yay, finally.
Saturday, December 15, 2012
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
top chef seattle: "birthday curse"
Top Chef Seattle, episode 05, air date Dec. 05, 2012
and now we're down to 14 chefs. more manageable? i hope so.
the sad sack
apparently there's a top chef birthday curse in new york where chefs had been eliminated on their birthdays...and it's stefan's 40th birthday! should he be worried?
quickfire: our guest judge today is daisley gordon of marche. the chefs have to pair up into teams of two. how the heck does beardie II end up with tucker??? it's not even like they were the very last two left that nobody wanted. is this a stunt to guarantee more airtime for the both of them? the challenge: make breakfast to go...on a stick. huh? daisley provides his pantry and they have to go shop for their cooking equipment...in an hour.
-not sure what team sara gilbert/aussie were doing but by the time they go to get food there are no eggs or dairy left. don't you know this is a QUICKfire? so they decide to make a european pancetta summer berry thing instead. comments are how delicious it is but it doesn't look substantial enough or terribly complex.
- team NDFC brooke/stefan are doing a pressed croque monsieur (aroo?) using ham, cheese, toasted fig and challah. holla!
it's hilarious to watch the scuttle butt in sur la table - especially sir bart trying to get around huge CJ and not having much success.
- team model/soul patch have joined forces because they're youngest. ok sure. they make a bacon & cinnamon waffle with cantaloupe.
- team beardie II/tucker are making breakfast tacos. again WHY did these two pair up when they clearly don't like each other??? how nice for the producers.
- team CJ/sad sack is making salmon on stick with a cream cheese arugla crepe. sounds yummy but how do you get that on a stick?
- team josie grossy/NDFC eliza is making ricotta raspberry pancake with sausage which looks like a napoleon on a stick.
- team sir bart/chilly willy make egg, pancetta, spinach & cheese paninis. all i know is sir bart is providing lots of visual comedy in this quickfire. between getting squashed by CJ at the store, going splat with the panini machine, and then doing lord-knows-what with some object on leg - it looks like he's going to town on himself...in a friendly way.
i just want to knock those forehead glasses off his head!
bottoms: sara gilbert/aussie with their berry pancetta and josie grossy/NDFC eliza with their ricotta pancake. the women are not doing well so far.
tops: sir bart/chilly willy with their panini and beardie II/tucker with their taco.
winner of the quickfire - sir bart and chilly willy! they are safe from elimination in the next challenge.
elimination challenge: chefs have to stay in the same teams for the elimination - too bad for beardie II but how convenient for the producers. the teams draw knives with various food ingredients which i assume can be found in pike place market. teams must make a lunch meal highlighting their ingredient.
- team sir bart/chilly willy draw salmon candy. their dish is candied salmon with a sweet and sour salad. i think i see some salmon roe in there. after this dish i think i'd be looking for some more lunch.
- team beardie II/tucker draw truffle popcorn. tucker is talking a mile a minute. beardie II looks like all he hears is "wonk-wonk-wonk wonk wonk." they make a pork tenderloin with popcorn grits. both of them have issues with what the other is doing yet neither is speaking up. do the realize that if their dish sucks THEY COULD GO HOME? idiots.
- team stefan/NDFC brooke draw rose petal jelly. duck with candied red cabbage.
- team CJ/the sad sack draw spicy dill pickles. neither of their ideas sound like they would highlight the pickle ingredient. but sad sack is definitely the more submissive of the two chefs so i'm sure they'll end up making CJ's pork burger with pickle topping.
- team josie grossy/NDFC eliza draw cardamom bitters. i didn't watch her season but i don't care for josie. i'm not seeing much talent and she's not likable. poor NDFC eliza.josie's their dish is a white king salmon with clam broth.
- team sara gilbert/aussie draw coconut curry chocolate. aussie wants to pair it with fish but sara gilbert is full steam ahead on dessert so aussie feels a bit steam rolled. sounds like will bite her in the ass later. and then sara gilbert declares that neither of them are dessert people - THEN WHY DO A DESSERT?? they make a coconut curry chocolate mousse tart.
- team model/soul patch draw cheese curds. they make curds three ways - bechamel, fried and raw.
hates: all of them. they have decided to eliminate a whole team. and he confirms the last chance kitchen myth to the cheftestants but they're too busy cowering from tom's reprimand to react.
loves: no one. for the first time ever (i think) the prize is rescinded and every one is told they suck.
sad sack says "if it happens tomorrow, it happens...i guess we weren't as creative as those all guys wanted" and beardie II just explodes. why? because he's a SAD SACK. he really has no business being in this competition and he seems to lack the confidence/ego to be a real chef. he's still here while a capable, inspired chef like kuniko is gone. that's an injustice. go LCK!
this top chef healthy choice commercial is kind of cracking me up "for years i thought i hated children's laughter. i had no idea, i was just hungry."
stefan worries that the birthday curse is coming for him and lo and behold, his team is selected for the bottom of the bottom along with beardie II/tucker and CJ/sad sack. judges' table basically rips into all three teams although they seemed to lay less heavily into stefan/NDFC brooke. as a last ditch effort, CJ tries to throw the dessert team under the bus - even though they're not on the chopping block - calling it an "abhorrence" and "a debacle, it was diabolical, it was a travesty." and unibrow hugh zings him with "uh-oh, 'cause your burger was even worse." at least they all had a good laugh about it.
knife packers: CJ and sad sack. so now sad sack has validated his outlook and CJ is a failure bitch.
quotables:
"chrissy who? carla who? bye! next one in line..." - stefan on his love for the recently eliminated chefs
"women in the 1500's probably put them on them because they were smelly." - stefan on his elimination challenge ingredient of rose petal jelly.
"the cupboard is bare just like everyone's imagination today, evidently." - tucker after their poor performance at the elimination challenge.
"i would feel like a total, absolute, like, failure bitch." - CJ on regrets about competing again.
"if you get too much, it feels like you're eating somebody's grandmother." - hugh acheson on rose petal jelly. umm...yeah.
LAST CHANCE KITCHEN: so now kuniko must battle CJ and sad sack for the top spot. who will win it? since CJ so thoroughly dissed another team's dessert, tom announced that they will be making dessert for LCK. and since CJ works so well in a team, he has to work with sad sack on the dish so it has become kuniko vs/ CJ/sad sack. sad sack decides to grow a spine (or at least some cartilage) since it was CJ's burger idea that got them ousted in the first place. he suggests some kind of smoked fruit fritter while CJ throws in hay ice cream. sad sack also grows a personality "HAY ice cream???? ok, FREAK-O!" when sad sack calls you a freak, you know it's bad. why is there even hay in the pantry? kuniko is making a lemon curd with a cylindrical fruit compote and i'm afraid it won't be enough.
tasting: tom actually enjoys both dishes as they both have savory elements to them (olive oil, kuniko, really?). but in the end CJ/sad sack take the prize. and apparently sad sack's nickname for himself is T-dog. not T-bone or KoKo? dang it, i'm sad to see my mom has been defeated. i'm not sure what this "save a chef" thing is that bravo is doing - is it like last last chance kitchen?
and now we're down to 14 chefs. more manageable? i hope so.
the sad sack
apparently there's a top chef birthday curse in new york where chefs had been eliminated on their birthdays...and it's stefan's 40th birthday! should he be worried?
quickfire: our guest judge today is daisley gordon of marche. the chefs have to pair up into teams of two. how the heck does beardie II end up with tucker??? it's not even like they were the very last two left that nobody wanted. is this a stunt to guarantee more airtime for the both of them? the challenge: make breakfast to go...on a stick. huh? daisley provides his pantry and they have to go shop for their cooking equipment...in an hour.
-not sure what team sara gilbert/aussie were doing but by the time they go to get food there are no eggs or dairy left. don't you know this is a QUICKfire? so they decide to make a european pancetta summer berry thing instead. comments are how delicious it is but it doesn't look substantial enough or terribly complex.
- team NDFC brooke/stefan are doing a pressed croque monsieur (aroo?) using ham, cheese, toasted fig and challah. holla!
it's hilarious to watch the scuttle butt in sur la table - especially sir bart trying to get around huge CJ and not having much success.
- team model/soul patch have joined forces because they're youngest. ok sure. they make a bacon & cinnamon waffle with cantaloupe.
- team beardie II/tucker are making breakfast tacos. again WHY did these two pair up when they clearly don't like each other??? how nice for the producers.
- team CJ/sad sack is making salmon on stick with a cream cheese arugla crepe. sounds yummy but how do you get that on a stick?
- team josie grossy/NDFC eliza is making ricotta raspberry pancake with sausage which looks like a napoleon on a stick.
- team sir bart/chilly willy make egg, pancetta, spinach & cheese paninis. all i know is sir bart is providing lots of visual comedy in this quickfire. between getting squashed by CJ at the store, going splat with the panini machine, and then doing lord-knows-what with some object on leg - it looks like he's going to town on himself...in a friendly way.
i just want to knock those forehead glasses off his head!
bottoms: sara gilbert/aussie with their berry pancetta and josie grossy/NDFC eliza with their ricotta pancake. the women are not doing well so far.
tops: sir bart/chilly willy with their panini and beardie II/tucker with their taco.
winner of the quickfire - sir bart and chilly willy! they are safe from elimination in the next challenge.
elimination challenge: chefs have to stay in the same teams for the elimination - too bad for beardie II but how convenient for the producers. the teams draw knives with various food ingredients which i assume can be found in pike place market. teams must make a lunch meal highlighting their ingredient.
- team sir bart/chilly willy draw salmon candy. their dish is candied salmon with a sweet and sour salad. i think i see some salmon roe in there. after this dish i think i'd be looking for some more lunch.
- team beardie II/tucker draw truffle popcorn. tucker is talking a mile a minute. beardie II looks like all he hears is "wonk-wonk-wonk wonk wonk." they make a pork tenderloin with popcorn grits. both of them have issues with what the other is doing yet neither is speaking up. do the realize that if their dish sucks THEY COULD GO HOME? idiots.
- team stefan/NDFC brooke draw rose petal jelly. duck with candied red cabbage.
- team CJ/the sad sack draw spicy dill pickles. neither of their ideas sound like they would highlight the pickle ingredient. but sad sack is definitely the more submissive of the two chefs so i'm sure they'll end up making CJ's pork burger with pickle topping.
- team josie grossy/NDFC eliza draw cardamom bitters. i didn't watch her season but i don't care for josie. i'm not seeing much talent and she's not likable. poor NDFC eliza.
- team sara gilbert/aussie draw coconut curry chocolate. aussie wants to pair it with fish but sara gilbert is full steam ahead on dessert so aussie feels a bit steam rolled. sounds like will bite her in the ass later. and then sara gilbert declares that neither of them are dessert people - THEN WHY DO A DESSERT?? they make a coconut curry chocolate mousse tart.
- team model/soul patch draw cheese curds. they make curds three ways - bechamel, fried and raw.
hates: all of them. they have decided to eliminate a whole team. and he confirms the last chance kitchen myth to the cheftestants but they're too busy cowering from tom's reprimand to react.
loves: no one. for the first time ever (i think) the prize is rescinded and every one is told they suck.
sad sack says "if it happens tomorrow, it happens...i guess we weren't as creative as those all guys wanted" and beardie II just explodes. why? because he's a SAD SACK. he really has no business being in this competition and he seems to lack the confidence/ego to be a real chef. he's still here while a capable, inspired chef like kuniko is gone. that's an injustice. go LCK!
this top chef healthy choice commercial is kind of cracking me up "for years i thought i hated children's laughter. i had no idea, i was just hungry."
stefan worries that the birthday curse is coming for him and lo and behold, his team is selected for the bottom of the bottom along with beardie II/tucker and CJ/sad sack. judges' table basically rips into all three teams although they seemed to lay less heavily into stefan/NDFC brooke. as a last ditch effort, CJ tries to throw the dessert team under the bus - even though they're not on the chopping block - calling it an "abhorrence" and "a debacle, it was diabolical, it was a travesty." and unibrow hugh zings him with "uh-oh, 'cause your burger was even worse." at least they all had a good laugh about it.
knife packers: CJ and sad sack. so now sad sack has validated his outlook and CJ is a failure bitch.
quotables:
"chrissy who? carla who? bye! next one in line..." - stefan on his love for the recently eliminated chefs
"women in the 1500's probably put them on them because they were smelly." - stefan on his elimination challenge ingredient of rose petal jelly.
"the cupboard is bare just like everyone's imagination today, evidently." - tucker after their poor performance at the elimination challenge.
"i would feel like a total, absolute, like, failure bitch." - CJ on regrets about competing again.
"if you get too much, it feels like you're eating somebody's grandmother." - hugh acheson on rose petal jelly. umm...yeah.
LAST CHANCE KITCHEN: so now kuniko must battle CJ and sad sack for the top spot. who will win it? since CJ so thoroughly dissed another team's dessert, tom announced that they will be making dessert for LCK. and since CJ works so well in a team, he has to work with sad sack on the dish so it has become kuniko vs/ CJ/sad sack. sad sack decides to grow a spine (or at least some cartilage) since it was CJ's burger idea that got them ousted in the first place. he suggests some kind of smoked fruit fritter while CJ throws in hay ice cream. sad sack also grows a personality "HAY ice cream???? ok, FREAK-O!" when sad sack calls you a freak, you know it's bad. why is there even hay in the pantry? kuniko is making a lemon curd with a cylindrical fruit compote and i'm afraid it won't be enough.
tasting: tom actually enjoys both dishes as they both have savory elements to them (olive oil, kuniko, really?). but in the end CJ/sad sack take the prize. and apparently sad sack's nickname for himself is T-dog. not T-bone or KoKo? dang it, i'm sad to see my mom has been defeated. i'm not sure what this "save a chef" thing is that bravo is doing - is it like last last chance kitchen?
Friday, December 7, 2012
survivor philippines: "poof..and lisa's plan is shot into smithereens"
Survivor Philippines, episode 12, air date Dec. 5, 2012
true to form, carter is not thinking about the fact that he is on the outside of the main alliance. or about strategy. or thinking at all.
#rewardchallenge - it's time for the loved ones challenge. lisa can hardly contain herself. skupin "litrally" slobbers all over his son. how tall is carter's mom? either he's a giant or she's only about 3 feet tall. lisa's brother comes out calling her "sister, sister" (weird?) and lisa just disintegrates. he also looks MUCH younger than her. abi's mom comes to visit. and as previewed, malcolm's brother is on hand. a couple interesting comments to note: malcolm says "i look so good now without a shirt on you won't believe." does this mean malcolm doesn't normally look good shirtless? is he typically chunkier/flabbier? and then he says "did you see jeff?" and his brother starts giggling like a school girl.
the challenge involves the survivor tossing a muddy bag to their loved one who will then use the muddy bag to knock down bamboo targets. abi is unable to get any bags to her mom as she continues to duck for cover every time a bag comes near her. fail. it's a pretty close race between everyone except abi but malcolm ends up winning the challenge. he gets to pick two to join him so he picks lisa and skupin to keep them tight in their alliance. poor denise.
what they played for: an overnight stay with their loved ones back at camp.
mike skupin jr. shows us that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree as he scrapes his arms bloody in an attempt to get coconuts. self injury must be in their DNA.
lisa, skupin and their loved ones are now talking about blindsiding malcolm and his idol. as usual lisa is having moral issues because she has given malcolm her word in their alliance but her brother is doing a pretty good job of helping her be OK with it. i bet malcolm will regret picking these two to hang out at camp. and even worse, as a result of this change in plans it could mean the abi survives another week. nooooo!
lisa's brother: i wonder what jesus would look like playing survivor?
skupin: sadly, a little bit like malcolm.
group laughter
lisa: and he would probably play like carter which is even worse!
ZING!
#immunitychallenge - race across balance beams, fish 3 bags of sticks out of the water, build a long stick with strings to poke the paddle and release a flag to win. abi seriously DRAGS ASS in this challenge, like she has absolutely nothing to worry about. does she know about the blindside malcolm plan? she's taking her sweet old time placing her bags on her shoulders like she's out clothes shopping or something. is she stupid or does she just not care? probst is totally calling her out on it.
lisa, skupin, carter and malcolm all give their sticks a shot at the paddle but most have to go back and re-adjust. malcolm looks like a drowned rat with his hair in his face and - HA, he's sticking his tongue out like a 5 year old does when using scissors - really concentrating. hilarious! and i guess it helps because he manages to maneuver his stick (hee hee) enough to win immunity! it is his first immunity win and it couldn't have come at a better time. with his HII, this means malcolm is guaranteed final four - woot woot! he is giddy with excitement. me too, me too.
denise looks like she is the only one who is truly happy for him, she is positively beaming. will he keep his word and take her to the end even though he doesn't think he can beat her? i wonder who malcolm thinks he has the best chance against?
unbelievably, they are talking about the possibility of voting out carter because he is a threat to win immunity. and when carter walks in on skupin and malcolm discussing his possible demise, he barely fights for himself. dude. don't you have any game?
abi is still hilariously trying to pretend like she has a HII. i'm not even sure anyone believes it because it never comes up during their strategy talks. she claims that if you say something enough, people will believe it. i think the only one she has convinced is herself.
malcolm makes a harry potter reference when he compares abi to a dementor. *swoon!* and he tells us he has webbed toes. *un-swoon*
tribal council:
- the jury comes in and there are lots of looks between penner and the castaways.
- skupin loves carter like a son.
- penner is shaking his head in disbelief that lisa would want to win the game by taking someone she knows she can beat to the finals. i guess that's why he's sitting over there!
- now abi is talking about her "fantasy" HII at tribal council! even penner is smirking about that one.
- jeff keeps pitting denise against abi, almost like he KNOWS that denise's words will hurt her the most. because they are the most honest, perhaps?
- will abi play her fake stick idol anyway, even though it will have no impact?
- 1 vote abi, 4 votes carter and carter is sent on his way. unbelievable. i have no love for carter but it sucks that abi gets to stick around any longer than necessary.
even in his farewell video, carter is incapable of inflecting any emotion in his voice. at. all. why is he SO dull??? i want to smack him just to see if he reacts in any normal way. what was on his audition tape that convinced them to cast him? whatever it was, he brought none of it with him to the philippines.
next week's previews show lisa entertaining the possibility of taking abi to the end so she can win. god help us all. i like lisa but her constant wishy washy-ness and "want to do the right thing" BS is starting to get on my nerves. i love the facts of life but it's time for blair warner to go. unfortunately that leaves skupin in the final 3. ugh, i can't win. go, go malcolm or denise!
true to form, carter is not thinking about the fact that he is on the outside of the main alliance. or about strategy. or thinking at all.
#rewardchallenge - it's time for the loved ones challenge. lisa can hardly contain herself. skupin "litrally" slobbers all over his son. how tall is carter's mom? either he's a giant or she's only about 3 feet tall. lisa's brother comes out calling her "sister, sister" (weird?) and lisa just disintegrates. he also looks MUCH younger than her. abi's mom comes to visit. and as previewed, malcolm's brother is on hand. a couple interesting comments to note: malcolm says "i look so good now without a shirt on you won't believe." does this mean malcolm doesn't normally look good shirtless? is he typically chunkier/flabbier? and then he says "did you see jeff?" and his brother starts giggling like a school girl.
 |
| heeheeheehee, it's jeff probst! |
what they played for: an overnight stay with their loved ones back at camp.
mike skupin jr. shows us that the apple doesn't fall far from the tree as he scrapes his arms bloody in an attempt to get coconuts. self injury must be in their DNA.
lisa, skupin and their loved ones are now talking about blindsiding malcolm and his idol. as usual lisa is having moral issues because she has given malcolm her word in their alliance but her brother is doing a pretty good job of helping her be OK with it. i bet malcolm will regret picking these two to hang out at camp. and even worse, as a result of this change in plans it could mean the abi survives another week. nooooo!
lisa's brother: i wonder what jesus would look like playing survivor?
skupin: sadly, a little bit like malcolm.
group laughter
lisa: and he would probably play like carter which is even worse!
ZING!
#immunitychallenge - race across balance beams, fish 3 bags of sticks out of the water, build a long stick with strings to poke the paddle and release a flag to win. abi seriously DRAGS ASS in this challenge, like she has absolutely nothing to worry about. does she know about the blindside malcolm plan? she's taking her sweet old time placing her bags on her shoulders like she's out clothes shopping or something. is she stupid or does she just not care? probst is totally calling her out on it.
 |
| how am i going to fit all this the trunk? |
 |
| "abi, what are you doing?! pick it up!" |
lisa, skupin, carter and malcolm all give their sticks a shot at the paddle but most have to go back and re-adjust. malcolm looks like a drowned rat with his hair in his face and - HA, he's sticking his tongue out like a 5 year old does when using scissors - really concentrating. hilarious! and i guess it helps because he manages to maneuver his stick (hee hee) enough to win immunity! it is his first immunity win and it couldn't have come at a better time. with his HII, this means malcolm is guaranteed final four - woot woot! he is giddy with excitement. me too, me too.
 |
| i think i can, i think i can |
 |
| proud mama |
abi is still hilariously trying to pretend like she has a HII. i'm not even sure anyone believes it because it never comes up during their strategy talks. she claims that if you say something enough, people will believe it. i think the only one she has convinced is herself.
malcolm makes a harry potter reference when he compares abi to a dementor. *swoon!* and he tells us he has webbed toes. *un-swoon*
tribal council:
- the jury comes in and there are lots of looks between penner and the castaways.
- skupin loves carter like a son.
- penner is shaking his head in disbelief that lisa would want to win the game by taking someone she knows she can beat to the finals. i guess that's why he's sitting over there!
- now abi is talking about her "fantasy" HII at tribal council! even penner is smirking about that one.
- jeff keeps pitting denise against abi, almost like he KNOWS that denise's words will hurt her the most. because they are the most honest, perhaps?
- will abi play her fake stick idol anyway, even though it will have no impact?
- 1 vote abi, 4 votes carter and carter is sent on his way. unbelievable. i have no love for carter but it sucks that abi gets to stick around any longer than necessary.
 |
| by day 33, this group is looking pretty well beat up |
next week's previews show lisa entertaining the possibility of taking abi to the end so she can win. god help us all. i like lisa but her constant wishy washy-ness and "want to do the right thing" BS is starting to get on my nerves. i love the facts of life but it's time for blair warner to go. unfortunately that leaves skupin in the final 3. ugh, i can't win. go, go malcolm or denise!
Thursday, December 6, 2012
top chef seattle: "two all day!"
top chef seattle, episode 04, air date november 28, 2012
i have been wanting to blog top chef this season but haven't yet because 1. it's tough to blog survivor and top chef when they air on the same night. one of them ends up suffering (guess which one?) and 2. there's just still too many damn chefs to effectively cover everyone. i haven't been able figure out who is who but i'll give it a shot because there's just some commentary that refuses to be silenced by my laziness.
john - who reminds me of tucker from there's something about mary - appears to be this season's resident jerk and could become the sole reason for my blog's existence. and he constantly wears his glasses on his forehead which just makes him look like an asshole if he isn't one in real life. beardie II (josh) gets into to it with tucker in the stew room, calling him a prick, an asshole and declares that he is the most hated chef in dallas for good reason.
quickfire: our guest judge is naomi pomeroy who apparently serves a lot of "land roaming animals" at her restaurant Beast. the cheftestants have to butcher their own beef to make a dish in one hour.
tucker and soul patch (micah) are making oxtail - YUM - loooooooove oxtail!
stefan is making some sort of meat ravioli using the front leg meat.
beardie II is making meatballs which look amaze-balls!
CJ is making tartare and is chowing down on the beef as he butchers it. i'm not sure but i think CJ may have a self-esteem issue (read: totally arrogant).
red headed sara gilbert (danyelle) and nondescript female chef eliza are making flank steak.
nondescript female chef brooke and flip chrissy make hangar steak.
model kristen and housewives of NJ (carla) both make the sirloin.
aussie lizzie tackled the pressure cooker with a foreshank.
our resident sad sack, tyler, makes a hispanic style crudo with bottom round.
chilly willy (sheldon) makes a kobe round.
it's a good thing we're having steak for dinner tomorrow because i'm having a serious craving right now.
on the bottom: lizzie, eliza and the sad sack "i can't do anything right." *hangs head*
on the top: beardie II, CJ, and tucker
tucker and his forehead glasses win the quickfire and immunity from the next elimination.
appearance-wise, lizzie, eliza and brooke are interchangeable to me. i can't tell them apart. at all. except one of them has an accent.
for having been the should-be winner from season 5, stefan does not appear to be shining this season. has the caliber gone up or is he just a little rusty?
elimination challenge: revive canlis' menu from 1950 for one night. winner gets $10,000 and two chefs go home. everyone scrambles to take on their part of the menu and since he has immunity, tucker will be the expediter.
of course tucker knows a lot about 1950's cooking because he knows everything about everything.
OMG, TOO MANY CHEFS!
beardie II is making the french onion soup - i bet he could use some pointers from tucker
model kristen is lamenting because she was straddled with measly sides - sauteed mushrooms and fried onions
sara gilbert red is making dessert, the royal hawaiian supreme
chrissy is making the canlis special salad, the only item that has survived the menu for the last 60 years. no pressure here.
housewives of NJ is in charge of the quail and she's using the heel of her hand to mash it into submission.
stefan is making zee liver (i wonder if there's a pearl in it?)
CJ is making shish kebabs
aussie lizzie is making the marinated herring
sad sack tyler is making the crab cocktail, which actually looks pretty stunning
tucker is making the steamed clam bordelaise
nondescript female chef brooke is making the seafood salad a la louis
chilly willy is making the mahi-mahi with beurre blanc
soul patch is making mixed vegetables
sir bart is making double cut new york steak
josie grossy is making the gargantuan baked idaho potato. gargantuan?!?
nondescript female chef eliza is making mint sherbert and the frozen hawaiian parfait
the judges for tonight's dinner include tom colicchio, emeril, and hugh acheson. do you think hugh's eyebrows has met the forehead glasses? maybe if they did, then unibrow could see that it's in serious need of some grooming.
squabs are coming back to the kitchen - that's not good for housewives of NJ!
chef's table:
on top are stefan, model kristen, aussie lizzie and the sad sack. yay, for sad sack! and model kristen wins $10K for her measly side dishes. they must have tasted AWESOME. stefan totally wants to hook up with the model.
on the bottom are housewives of NJ, CJ, chrissy and beardie II. beardie II's soup was salty and cold and he blames tucker for his monkey expediting. chrissy's salad was over-dressed and soggy. housewives of NJ's squab was too bony and difficult to eat. CJ's shish kebabs were underseasoned and mealy. chrissy and housewives of NJ must pack their knives and go. will we miss carla in the kitchen?
oh, but they're doing last chance kitchen again this season. first battle is between jeffrey, my mom, chrissy and housewives of NJ. and the previews show colicchio sending a WHOLE TEAM home?!? what??
quotables:
"i felt like the housewives of seattle" - stefan on the current tucker drama going on in the house
"i like it super dirty" - stefan on classic martinis from the 50's
"the belgian guy that speaks french, whatever." - geography king beardie II on having the "french" guy (sir bart) make the french onion soup
"behind you. big giant...thing of...stuff." - CJ, clearly a very eloquent speaker
"josie's potato is like a planet!" - nondescript female chef on josie grossy's gargantuan baked potato
LAST CHANCE KITCHEN: the first installment pits jeffrey, kuniko, chrissy and carla against one another. their challenge: prepare a winning dish using the same ingredients that got them ousted - can be the same one or an entirely new dish but they must use the given main ingredients. kuniko is the only one of the group that chooses to make a completely different dish, she makes an asian potato chowder. tom declares that all of the contestants have presented dishes that would NOT have sent them home except carla's squab. poor housewives of NJ. kuniko's dish is the winner and she will move on to battle next week's eliminated chef.
i have been wanting to blog top chef this season but haven't yet because 1. it's tough to blog survivor and top chef when they air on the same night. one of them ends up suffering (guess which one?) and 2. there's just still too many damn chefs to effectively cover everyone. i haven't been able figure out who is who but i'll give it a shot because there's just some commentary that refuses to be silenced by my laziness.
john - who reminds me of tucker from there's something about mary - appears to be this season's resident jerk and could become the sole reason for my blog's existence. and he constantly wears his glasses on his forehead which just makes him look like an asshole if he isn't one in real life. beardie II (josh) gets into to it with tucker in the stew room, calling him a prick, an asshole and declares that he is the most hated chef in dallas for good reason.
 |
| the real tucker |
 |
| the original beardie |
tucker and soul patch (micah) are making oxtail - YUM - loooooooove oxtail!
stefan is making some sort of meat ravioli using the front leg meat.
beardie II is making meatballs which look amaze-balls!
CJ is making tartare and is chowing down on the beef as he butchers it. i'm not sure but i think CJ may have a self-esteem issue (read: totally arrogant).
red headed sara gilbert (danyelle) and nondescript female chef eliza are making flank steak.
nondescript female chef brooke and flip chrissy make hangar steak.
model kristen and housewives of NJ (carla) both make the sirloin.
aussie lizzie tackled the pressure cooker with a foreshank.
our resident sad sack, tyler, makes a hispanic style crudo with bottom round.
chilly willy (sheldon) makes a kobe round.
it's a good thing we're having steak for dinner tomorrow because i'm having a serious craving right now.
on the bottom: lizzie, eliza and the sad sack "i can't do anything right." *hangs head*
on the top: beardie II, CJ, and tucker
tucker and his forehead glasses win the quickfire and immunity from the next elimination.
appearance-wise, lizzie, eliza and brooke are interchangeable to me. i can't tell them apart. at all. except one of them has an accent.
for having been the should-be winner from season 5, stefan does not appear to be shining this season. has the caliber gone up or is he just a little rusty?
elimination challenge: revive canlis' menu from 1950 for one night. winner gets $10,000 and two chefs go home. everyone scrambles to take on their part of the menu and since he has immunity, tucker will be the expediter.
of course tucker knows a lot about 1950's cooking because he knows everything about everything.
OMG, TOO MANY CHEFS!
beardie II is making the french onion soup - i bet he could use some pointers from tucker
model kristen is lamenting because she was straddled with measly sides - sauteed mushrooms and fried onions
sara gilbert red is making dessert, the royal hawaiian supreme
chrissy is making the canlis special salad, the only item that has survived the menu for the last 60 years. no pressure here.
housewives of NJ is in charge of the quail and she's using the heel of her hand to mash it into submission.
stefan is making zee liver (i wonder if there's a pearl in it?)
CJ is making shish kebabs
aussie lizzie is making the marinated herring
sad sack tyler is making the crab cocktail, which actually looks pretty stunning
tucker is making the steamed clam bordelaise
nondescript female chef brooke is making the seafood salad a la louis
chilly willy is making the mahi-mahi with beurre blanc
soul patch is making mixed vegetables
sir bart is making double cut new york steak
josie grossy is making the gargantuan baked idaho potato. gargantuan?!?
nondescript female chef eliza is making mint sherbert and the frozen hawaiian parfait
the judges for tonight's dinner include tom colicchio, emeril, and hugh acheson. do you think hugh's eyebrows has met the forehead glasses? maybe if they did, then unibrow could see that it's in serious need of some grooming.
squabs are coming back to the kitchen - that's not good for housewives of NJ!
chef's table:
on top are stefan, model kristen, aussie lizzie and the sad sack. yay, for sad sack! and model kristen wins $10K for her measly side dishes. they must have tasted AWESOME. stefan totally wants to hook up with the model.
on the bottom are housewives of NJ, CJ, chrissy and beardie II. beardie II's soup was salty and cold and he blames tucker for his monkey expediting. chrissy's salad was over-dressed and soggy. housewives of NJ's squab was too bony and difficult to eat. CJ's shish kebabs were underseasoned and mealy. chrissy and housewives of NJ must pack their knives and go. will we miss carla in the kitchen?
oh, but they're doing last chance kitchen again this season. first battle is between jeffrey, my mom, chrissy and housewives of NJ. and the previews show colicchio sending a WHOLE TEAM home?!? what??
quotables:
"i felt like the housewives of seattle" - stefan on the current tucker drama going on in the house
"i like it super dirty" - stefan on classic martinis from the 50's
"the belgian guy that speaks french, whatever." - geography king beardie II on having the "french" guy (sir bart) make the french onion soup
"behind you. big giant...thing of...stuff." - CJ, clearly a very eloquent speaker
"josie's potato is like a planet!" - nondescript female chef on josie grossy's gargantuan baked potato
LAST CHANCE KITCHEN: the first installment pits jeffrey, kuniko, chrissy and carla against one another. their challenge: prepare a winning dish using the same ingredients that got them ousted - can be the same one or an entirely new dish but they must use the given main ingredients. kuniko is the only one of the group that chooses to make a completely different dish, she makes an asian potato chowder. tom declares that all of the contestants have presented dishes that would NOT have sent them home except carla's squab. poor housewives of NJ. kuniko's dish is the winner and she will move on to battle next week's eliminated chef.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)